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Apparently Neil Patel is Famous

neil

Update: Neil just told me that he is getting emails saying that I am trashing on him, hello, I am joking and this post is humor, if you don’t get that the first time, read his article I quote, and then read my post again. It is sorta just doing everything the opposite of what he recommends. Funny, not bad. It plays off what he says in his article. I have made a graphic at the end of this post that will help those without a sense of humor figure this out.

Neil Patel rocks. Thanks for letting me know about that Neil.

Okay, I have to get this off my chest. Neil Patel pisses me off, and it is not just because he is famous. He pisses me off because people won’t stop talking about how famous he is. What is the next big topic of the web? How famous his famousness is?

I certainly will have no part in that.

Okay, so he writes incredibly useful, compact articles with titles so good that it makes a giant hand come out of our F5 buttons that slaps us until we Digg his stories. Whoopty doo.

I almost puked when I saw his 5 ways to increase your fame article on his new QuickSprout blog which will soon have to be called “QuickSapling” then “QuickTree” and then “Quick-ah-fuck-it-call-it-what-you-want”. He won’t care cause he will know the entire population of the earth.

Please stop hurtling wonderful, useful and good information at us Neil.

Okay, in his article “5 ways to increase your fame” Neil states 5 points…

1) Call People Out

To illustrate his point he starts off with this sentence… “Controversy is a great thing especially if it is done in a productive manner.” to which I reply

BULLSHIT - Get with the program Neil, controversy is dead. It is time to move on to the future and the future is blending in.

2) Gain A Backbone

Okay, he is totally right about this.

3) Get In Front of the Parade

WTF? In addition to the obvious logistical problems this presents, it is also dumb and if this is some sort of “whatever you call those things where one thing means something else” then you could at least have the courtesy to explain it to us.

note to Neil: the first sentence of this paragraph is underlined for no reason whatsoever which is irritating beyond description.

4) Differentiate Yourself

No Neil, differentiate yourself from all the other people who are famously successful on the web. You all are all alike.

5) Your as smart as you want to be

I don’t understand this and it pisses me off.

And btw, in case it isn’t perfectly clear that this whole post is smart ass, then let me state it clearly. Neil does not piss me off, he delights me with great information every time I read his stuff.

I read, enjoy, and recommend Neil Patel’s new blog Quicksprout.com

Guide to humor one:

idiots guide

Guide to humor two:

idiot guide 2

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3 Responses to “Apparently Neil Patel is Famous”

  1. Neil Patel Says:

    Patrick, I appreciate your insight on my new blog. I understand that you may not like it and may find that the information is basic, but there are thousands of people who will find it useful.

    1. I don’t see how controversy is dead… just think about the buzz worthy stuff in this world like politics, a lot of it is based on controversy.

    2. The get in front of the parade thing is to teach people not to sit in the background like how you are. If you get out there, speak at all the SEO conferences and do other things to get more well known you probably would be more successful. But granted some people don’t want the fame and you could be one of those individuals.

    Thanks for pointing out the underline, it is actually the way the text links are setup. All text links are underlined.

    4. Most people know me for social media and there aren’t too many people who are actually really good at social media. That is why I got well known… and I also don’t think there are too many blogs on personal branding.

    5. The you are as smart as you want to be is that you can play games to gain more attention. This may not be for everyone but some people get enjoyment out of playing games and if done right it could create a memorable impression.

  2. Neil Patel Says:

    Glad you like the blog. :)

  3. pat Says:

    I really do, thanks for swinging by.


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